I Forgive.

I did not understand forgiveness.  What was I to do with deep emotions of betrayal and anger?

Pastors would preach that forgiveness is an act of my will and if I didn’t forgive others, God wouldn’t forgive me (see Matthew 6:14-15).  In my mind, I’d make a decision to forgive but my heart knew I was still full of bitterness.  My anger increased at the thought that I, the victim of wrongdoing, now deserved God’s unforgiveness!?!  It made no sense!

Until, one day I heard a different teaching on forgiveness.  The idea was to think in terms of forgiving a debt.  The pastor had us ask the question –
                         What does this person owe me?  

It dawned on me that the only thing the unforgiven in my life could owe me was an apology.  I laughed at the absurdity.  There was nothing the unforgiven could do that would undo the harm done to me.  This huge weight I’d carried of anger and bitterness, and the only payment I could receive was an apology.  

I could forgive that debt.  The dark cloud that was so heavy upon me for years shriveled to the size of a gnat which I flicked away.  I learned what forgiveness feels like – FREEDOM!

Knowing truths such as these two scriptures also help me to forgive:

        “And my God shall supply all your need according to His riches in glory by Christ Jesus.” (Philippians 4:19 NKJV).

        “The young lions lack and suffer hunger; but those who seek the LORD shall not lack any good thing.” (Psalm 34:10 NKJV)

What good could anyone owe me that has not already been provided through God?

Just to be clear, forgiveness doesn’t mean that I have to trust the ones I’ve forgiven.  This is a good time to ask God for wisdom.  Healthy boundaries are necessary; forgive and forget might not be wise.  However, God’s love covers a multitude of sin and thinks the best of people.  God has miraculously healed my wounds and l hope He has also brought about changes in the lives of those I struggled to forgive. 

So…
Forgiveness:

        Ask – What does this person owe me?  

        Put a name on that debt.  

        Let it go.  Trust God that all your needs are met.
        Walk forth in love.

I love this life!

Copyright 2012 Leah Lambert Smith

*Matthew 6:14-15  (NKJV)      “For if you forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. ¹⁵ But if you do not forgive men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.”

Copyright 2012 Leah Lambert Smith

Perspective

The Pink Elephant:


It looms large between us filling the room.

He feeds it every day, tries to clean up after it. 

He smiles and gives me a glass of tea.  The niceties that are put forth seem tiny compared to the elephant’s massive size. 

Don’t you see you have to reach around a pink elephant to share a glass of tea with me?

Of course he sees the elephant but knows the situation is too large for him to handle.  So, he reaches around and gives me a glass of tea. 

Only Jesus can handle an elephant like that.  In fact, He already has. 

The pink elephant no longer dominates my vision.  I’m free to see the beauty of my friend.  Free to appreciate the massive size of his love as we share tea.

I love this life - Leah